The Best Places in America for Dating Under 35

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This story was produced by Hims and reviewed and distributed by Stacker.

The best places in America for dating under 35

It's no secret that dating can be overwhelming in your 20s and 30s, especially when it feels like everyone around you is already married or cohabitating with a partner.

That's why it might help to position yourself in a region that has fewer couples, a larger number of people under age 35, and more potential date spots.

While every city has its pros and cons when it comes to dating, living in a place that's likely to have more singles and people in a similar life stage can help. Hims compiled a list of the top 25 U.S. counties for dating based on four data sets that measure the number of single households, median age, restaurant volume per capita, and proximity to a major metropolitan area. The following metrics were analyzed to develop the list:

One-person households by United States county: About half of single adults report that they're looking to date someone, according to a Pew Research Center survey. In counties that have fewer married or cohabitating partners, it's likely easier to find a potential partner.
Median age by U.S. county: While wider age differences are becoming more common between partners, the average age gap in opposite-sex marriages is only 2.2 years, according to the Pew Research Center. That suggests most couples prefer to date people close in age to them, making places where the population skews younger more appealing for dating under 35.
The number of restaurants per capita in each state: Cities that have more restaurants have been shown to be more conducive to romantic relationships, because they're especially well-suited for dates, according to a study by researchers at the Georgia Institute of Technology.
The proximity of each county to a major metropolitan area: A 2019 analysis in the journal Sociological Science showed that geographic proximity is the strongest driver of romantic interaction, indicating that closeness to a populous area can increase dating opportunities.

Key Findings

Washington, D.C., known as the center of U.S. politics, has the highest percentage of single households of any region in the country. Additionally, even though it's small by geographical area, it has more total restaurants than a number of large states, including Wyoming, South Dakota, and Alaska. While the median age of 34.9 is slightly older than other places on the list, it's still younger than the nation's average of 38.9.
A handful of the largest counties in the U.S.—including those that contain New York City, Chicago, and Philadelphia—made the list, suggesting that younger, single people congregate in big cities.
Counties that contain major college towns—Ames, Iowa (Iowa State University) and Athens, Georgia (University of Georgia)—came out near the top of the rankings. That's likely due to both the student population, and the number of people that stick around after graduation for jobs or master's level study.
Counties in California and Texas, the two most populous states in the U.S., didn't make the list, largely because they have among the lowest percentages of single households in the nation, according to Census data.

Curious about whether your city made it on the list? The results may surprise you.

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Hims

The Top U.S. Cities For Dating Under 35

Washington, D.C.
Ames, Iowa (Story County)
Athens, Georgia (Clarke County)
Nashville, Tennessee (Davidson County)
Corvallis, Oregon (Benton County)
St. Louis, Missouri (St. Louis City)
New York, New York (New York County)
Denver, Colorado (Denver County)
Fargo, North Dakota (Cass County)
Ithaca, New York (Tompkins County)
Gainesville, Florida (Alachua County)
Iowa City, Iowa (Johnson County)
Boston, Massachusetts (Suffolk County)
Columbia, Missouri (Boone County)
Fayetteville, North Carolina (Cumberland County)
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania (Philadelphia County)
Milwaukee, Wisconsin (Milwaukee County)
Greenville, North Carolina (Pitt County)
Atlanta, Georgia (Fulton County)
New Orleans, Louisiana (Orleans Parish)
Columbia, South Carolina (Richland County)
Bloomington, Illinois (McLean County)
Baton Rouge, Louisiana (East Baton Rouge Parish County)
Lincoln, Nebraska (Lancaster County)
Dayton, Ohio (Montgomery County)

Trends and Insights

Each of the criteria behind the rankings tell a more nuanced story about each county. Let's take a closer look at how each individual category influenced the final rankings.

Which Cities Have the Fewest Couples?

Large cities, where young adults often flock to after college, had the highest percentage of single households on the list.

Living in a place where there is a greater percentage of single households naturally increases your chances of finding a partner, especially because the majority of single Americans between 18 and 49 are looking for either a committed relationship or casual dates, according to Pew Research.

St. Louis, Missouri, had the most one-person households for its population size, followed by New York City, Washington D.C., and New Orleans.

Which Cities Have the Youngest Median Population?

It's no surprise that the counties with large college towns had younger median populations than other regions: Ames, Iowa (Story County), and Athens, Georgia (Clarke County), both have median ages below 30. Still, about 50% of people in Ames and 80% of people in Athens are not students (based on the total enrollment compared to population), indicating that there are still plenty of potential partners to meet even after graduation.

Which States Have the Most Restaurants Per Capita?

Cultivating a long-term relationship with someone you meet online or through friends usually begins with dates in public spaces. Research from the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology shows that "unique value" in a partner, which is built through shared experiences, including getting to know each other at restaurants, matters more to relationships than physical attractiveness.

Washington, D.C., has the largest number of restaurants per capita on our list, followed by Corvallis, Oregon (Benton County), and New York City.

How Does Proximity to a Metro Area Impact the Data?

A number of rural regions in states including Montana, South Dakota, and Alaska have young, single populations—but they're located many miles from major metropolitan areas. This report focused on counties within 25 miles of a big city, in order to concentrate on places that have more lively entertainment, food, and travel scenes for young people.

Data and Methodology

To rank the top counties for dating under the age of 35, Hims looked at every county in the U.S. and its proximity to Census-designated metropolitan areas. Counties were the focus of this report because the Census does not provide this data by specific city. For the list of 25 cities, the report pulled out the largest city within close proximity of a particular county, and removed duplicate cities from the final ranking. A point system was then applied to each of the four criteria to calculate a final score for each county. Those with the most points were ranked at the top of the list:

Median age by county: The report used the latest data from the Census Bureau on median age by United States county and applied a point system to each region. Counties with a median age less than 30 got the most points, those between 30 and 40 received points on a sliding scale, and those with an average age over 40 were given no points.
One-person households: The Census Bureau measures U.S. households based on whether they contain married couples, unmarried cohabiting couples, or single people. The report gave the most points to counties where 15% or more of total households were single. Counties with 5% or less one-person households were given no points.
Restaurants per capita: The report calculated restaurants per capita in each state using the total restaurant count from the National Restaurant Association, divided by the total population tallied by the Census Bureau. Counties in states with more restaurants per capita received more points.
Proximity to metropolitan area: Counties that were high in the ranking, but were not within 25 miles of a Census-designated metropolitan area were eliminated from the list.

Tips for Better Dating Wherever You Live

If you're in your 20s or 30s, living in a place where there are more young, single people and a lively restaurant scene can certainly help with your overall dating prospects, but there are ways to have a better dating life wherever you live.

Whether you just joined a dating app or have been on the scene for a few years, it's important to remember to take care of your own well-being so that you can show up as your best self.

Take care of your mental and physical health: Dating can be hard enough as it is, and dating with depression can feel even more daunting. If you have social anxiety, depression, or just struggle putting yourself out there, consider talking with a mental health professional about talk therapy or medications for anxiety or depression that may improve your day-to-day functioning. Getting enough sleep—typically at least seven hours for adults—is key to maintaining a positive headspace and feeling good physically. Practicing safe sex and sex positivity are also critically important in any kind of intimate relationship.
Communicate and ask questions: On a first date, remember to be interested in the other person and ask open-ended questions. This shows that you are paying attention, which can ease nerves and keep the conversation flowing, according to The Gottman Institute.
Treat any conditions that may affect your dating life: If you struggle with common conditions like low libido, erectile dysfunction, or premature ejaculation, you're not alone (yes, even in your 20s). Talking to a healthcare provider can help you figure it out and explore treatment options to regain your confidence to get back in the dating game.